Danger in the Checkout Line

Okay, I've never posted a disclaimer before, but if you find yourself appalled at topics like genitalia and menstruation...you best sit this one out.

The checkout line is always a dangerous spot for us. Not because of the temptation of all the candy and pop. Oh, no. It is dangerous simply because for that three minutes or so, my boys have a captive audience. This was a problem when my boys were younger because whatever was rolling around their little minds popped out of their mouths. Like the time one of them was potty training and told the cashier that he had on big boy underwear. Not a big deal, but then he pulled down his pants to show her his little Winnie-the-Pooh underwear. When another one of my boys was learning about the differences between boys and girls, he asked another unsuspecting cashier if she had a penis. It didn't embarrass my boys any as one of them even pulled down his pants to show everyone what a penis was, just in case they didn't know...

Like I said, it was a much bigger problem when the boys were little, but now I find myself following in their footsteps. Last night, while checking out, the man behind me was asking for directions for potato salad and the boys were doing something else and I was digging through my purse for a quarter. I found my quarter, closed my purse..and then discovered that while rifling through my purse, I had knocked out a lone...women's sanitary product...and it was now moving all alone down the conveyor belt. I am proud to say that I didn't panic. I told myself that 1) I am in a grocery store and people buy whole boxes of these all the time and 2) nature is a beautiful thing. My boys just watched the whole thing and thought nothing of it. After all, these are the boys that have proudly plastered themselves with pads and declared them big band-aids. They thought they would make terrific band-aids until they had to tear them off of their wounds...duh...

I'm sticking to U-Scan now, baby.